Almost 24

I grew up in a household much like yours and come from a similar background so I completely empathize with what you’re going through. Though I was never really fortunate enough to intimately connect with girls in my youth, I’m convinced I was born heterosexual, or overwhelmingly heterosexual. My homosexual tendencies were quite latent(appearing around the age of 13). I’m 23, almost 24 now, my father is very conservative christian, was raised in the environment back in the 60’s (I’m more of a libertarian), I came out somewhat prematurely while I was in Army Basic Training, he did NOT and still does not receive it well. I was raised to be a christian and had a lot of internalized, repressed homophobia in my youth, and have spent several years now trying to reconcile my spiritual beliefs with my carnal desires. I’ve learned several things;
1. not all Christians respond to our lifestyle with vitriol,
2. just because the church (an institution comprised of other humans with their own faults, biases, egos) claims to “Know and god, and that he speaks through them” does not mean they actually do,
3. As others here have pointed out, the text that formed the modern interpretation of scripture have been skewed throughout history through miss translation/transcription, many would agree the Bible is a good source of information, but just like everything else in the world it will never give a full picture of the past, of how Jesus Christ himself actually felt and by extension the lord. The lord is unknowable and incomprehensible to the human mind, but we’re supposed to know for certain that he experiences baser human emotions like disgust and pain at the sight of his children loving each other unconventionally?
4. Your parents and family are their own human beings and choose their own fate and path just as you choose yours, do not allow yourself to be made to feel guilty about embracing your own path, your own autonomy, agency, and independent free will. Do not be scared, or guilt tripped into feeling that you have to live your life for the sake of others. Our predecessors choosing to allow themselves to be bothered by our choices and actions, is their problem, it’s their CHOICE. Live your life the way you want to and let it be true, DO NOT LIVE A LIE for the sake of others, lying to one’s own self, in my opinion, is a greater sin a man can commit than homosexuality.
5. Initially in my adolescence when I confronted these feelings I was quite confused because I did and still do feel my self being attracted to women, but now I was also questioning if I was gay because I liked cocks? Well I arrived at a simple conclusion, I’m just bi.
Perhaps in this conflict you feel you haven’t been able to connect with your significant other due to your anxiety over it all, have you given yourself the option that you may potentially be bisexual? – A. Non

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By bisexual, sacred journey8 Comments on Almost 24

8 Replies to “Almost 24”

  3. Mid 30’s now. I was 100 percent straight as in I only fantasized about girls when I was younger. That changed when I made a close friend around 13-14 or so and somehow we started to jerk off together but it was definitely awkward at first. I think it started cause he’d always show himself off but I can’t quite remember? Dude definitely could shoot more than me (in the beginning of our games, but as time passed not even close haha) After a bit, we turned it into a proper game like who can shoot first or further, try to hit a target. That kinda thing. Shared porn and interesting ways to nut, like frotting (man that was fun) and always excited to talk about our cocks and help the other guy out. Miss the guy and hope he is doing ok now. Haven’t heard from him in over a decade.

    Currently, my best friend and I talk daily about our loads and how to workout. A pump of a different type, not the same games as with buddy but now it’s like jelqing methods or our records for male kegels to how diet effects our loads (eat nuts and hemp seeds if you can, magnesium seems to help too) or how to deal with stamina during sex with our wives. Dude is a hung donkey lol yet thinks himself small. (Porn really skewed with people’s view of themselves.)

    Now, I’m married to a woman I love and basically 50/50 split bisexual. Some days more gay, some days more straight, but I love sex.
    I love male and female forms of all types. Though I tend to thick cock is a bit better looking, it’s always fun to go down on my wife 🙂

    Thank you for sharing, friend. Your sexuality is your own and not beholden to another’s judgement. Be yourself and be true. You don’t need to slot yourself into a label if you don’t want to. Sometimes I joke with my friend when morning wood is tapping my belly button that if God is everywhere he’s got a nice boner now!

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  4. I’m possibly going too far in suggesting what other men should believe – but here it goes from a devout atheist. In my view, faith in a supernatural being arises from the fact that many things that happen in the world are difficult to understand or accept, so humans have developed the “comfortable” idea of God. Belief in God, by definition, requires faith, as there is not and never will be proof that God exists. Being an atheist does not require faith, and not having faith does not mean one has no beliefs or morals.
    I believe that everyone should approach moral decisions with a simple rule – what creates maximal human flourishing?
    To Cliff – is your lust actually keeping you from flourishing? If not, move past the guilt you are feeling about your lust – which is a normal human feeling.

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  5. I am newly returned to faith after decades of running from God and the church because of indoctrination of Bible hate and gods wrath. I have shown and told in no uncertain terms that I am a Beloved of God. It hasn’t been easy lots of turmoil. But my shame at being gay was removed in an instant. I am very happy in my faith and loving Father. My biggest issue right now is lust…like the obsession with and excess of sex but not sex and attraction itself. We are lucky to witness the widening of Gods mercy. Learning about the bad translations and false teachings of the Bible are eye opening. Westernized Christianity is false religion. Do not ever think there is ANY reason your creator doesn’t love you

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  6. Hello 24,

    Something I found interesting is that you say you came out young, while your father chose not to. Do you think he is a repressed bisexual?

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  8. I enjoyed your commentary…You make some excellent points about sexuality and religious-moral views..I can say that i agree with much of what you say…I too am bisexual.loving pussy since the first one i ever peeked at…I admire lots of dicks and wish but i have yet to have a dick in my mouth…dont get out much so the chances are very slim…If that was you on the opening page of this..I thought immediately that yours was a dick that i would gladly suck!!!

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