Being Drunk

Being drunk led to me having my cock sucked for the first time. Returning from a heavy night in the pub, a friend and I wandered for some reason up the driveway of a random house, where we stopped to talk. Our drunken conversation led to me daring my friend to suck my penis, which he duly did. After we’d walked on a bit further, I dared him a couple of more times to suck my cock, and each time he happily complied. Sober the next morning, I felt shame and fear over the act. In fact, I’d had my first gay kiss a few weeks earlier when, drunk also, another friend had come on to me. Despite claiming that I was not gay, I remember enjoying the kissing and the sensual rubbing of his moustache against my face. After the cock-sucking, I stayed off alcohol for six months and tried to ignore the incident. But, of course, my homosexual longings won through in the end. For me, this was a clear case of “vino veritas” (in wine, there is truth). HugH

Alcohol makes me more relaxed and affectionate around my wife. She wishes I would drink more, but I don’t have the time and energy to process it because alcohol is so physically draining for me. But the advantage of self acceptance is that I don’t have to pretend to myself while sober, and alcohol just makes me more aware of feelings that I privately acknowledge at all times. But it also makes me aware of my good reasons for not acting on every impulse, so I betray nothing no matter how drunk. Alcohol therefore plays absolutely no role in my attraction to men. My wife knows about my feelings, and also knows that I will take absolutely no steps that would require her to deal with them or their consequences. Alerik