Dear Mr Cox, I’m writing with a question – but first let me just say that you have what I think is a very enlightened and enlightening website. Personally, I find the references to Sacred Sexuality and the emphasis on masculine adult male sexuality very refreshing. There truly IS a HEALTHY side to it, and I’m so glad to see someone out there who knows that. I cut my teeth on Aleister Crowley, by the way, too. My question, sir – I saw a quote on your website that said something to the effect of ‘All psychological neuroses can be cured by constant and repeated sexual gratification.’ I’m wondering if you could tell me WHO that quote was from? So I might read some of his thoughts further? I’m an ‘ugly’ dude, with a 200 IQ, and yes, I’ve finally settled on being certifiably nuts and retiring from the world. Too many double standards, stigmas, etc. What is going on REALLY is NOT what they TELL you is going on, and so on. Life is a beauty contest, at the expense of some much deeper things. So anyways, I really think that quote is very true. Not ALL neuroses could be thusly cured, but healthier, realistic views on sex would sure HELP a lot. You know, for example – All the beautiful people running around breeding willy-nilly, but how many of them even KNOW what Sacred Sexuality even is? Or the obsession with beauty? No problem there, but when it turns into the hate of the ugly, then there’s a problem. I could go on and on – this is the story of my life. But anyways, it would be so much appreciated if you might reply and tell me the name of the Psychoanylist who made the statement about sexual gratification as the cure-all? Bliss Out, – RB
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Wow all very deep but like the Ben I think ugly is an ugly word and it’s all about presentation, I used to be happy with who I was, but as age has ravaged my body with a disfiguring disease I now look in the mirror and say yuck!(not that I look in it often) I once sent a photo to someone who asked what I looked like and I never got a reply, when I looked back at the photo, I hastily sent an apology and told him if someone had sent me a similar picture I probably would have said thanks! but no thanks! as I think manners cost nothing. But no matter what I do presentation wise I am destined to be alone for my golden years, I have come to terms with that so it’s ok. And just as Ben says if you present well I am sure you are not as ugly(it’s that word again perhaps I should say cover page material, less of a put down) as you believe, I know I am not, I just cannot present well these days, being in chronic pain and either on a mobility scooter or using crutches doesn’t do much for the image! and due to mobility the pounds have gone on and I can do nothing to shift them. I have seen many men and women over my life and I try to look past the presentation and would love to be able to be honest and say to them, smarten yourself up! but that would be just plain rude, so we say nothing and let them shrink into the background as I do now even though I try my best, to look neat and tidy, always washed and properly dressed when I go out. Shaving is not always possible as the razor tends to tear up my face and going out covered in blood or plasters is not a good look either. We live in such a shallow world and people look to the outside for beauty when the real beauty often shines within and is sadly missed. Please don’t put yourself down and hide away I am sure you have a beautiful soul let it shine and bring happiness to those who will allow you into their world. All the best and be happy.
Brother, I don’t mean to trivialize your situation, but… there is a very easy solution to at least one of your problems – if shaving is difficult, grow an awesome beard!
Even if you’re on a mobility scooter, you have a thing to be proud of. People will see you groom it and I promise you, it might not guarantee you a date, but it will make you look healthier. A nice groomed beard makes ANY man look healthier, and the same will be true for you. 🖤
LOL Thank you Ben and sorry for the late reply but been rather unwell for a while, growing a beard is not an option I am sad to say although I did once have one. I have a type of dermatitis that I have to cream regularly and a beard would stop that from happening and also it makes the dermatitis worse, but I thank you for the suggestion.
I bet you are beautiful and anyways a winning personality shows more beauty in a person than look I don’t see those other things at all and never yourself down we have all those phonies to do it for us , keep looking in thzat mirror and it will show a beautiful and gorgeous reflection , I saw it !!
Joey you are very sweet, Thank you.
Dude in the front cover doesn’t look ugly at all. he looks good for a big guy and hairy
I’m pretty sure that image is AI generated. Just like this one. 😋
RB
In my experience, I’ve encountered very very few people who are truly ugly. As a disclaimer, I don’t count in people with physical deformities, either from birth or from accident. The people I’ve deemed as ugly have all had a combination of common denominators.
First and foremost, they don’t take care of themselves. At all. They have bad skin, bad hygiene, bad teeth, don’t groom at all, make no effort whatsoever to present their best self. When they post images of themselves you can almost smell the 3days old hotdog water.
Most, if not all religions out there have a saying similar to “your body is a temple”, and you need to treat it as such.
Another thing they all have in common is that they have very abrasive personalities. They’re not nice. They’re bitter, entitled, and they suck the energy out of every social encounter until you have none more to give. You don’t wanna be around such a person.
Over the years I’ve taken a good look at the Incel movement. I’m always astonished how many of these men aren’t ugly at all. They look like regular guys. The kind you see in relationships all the time. The only thing wrong with them is (and this is huge) the unattainable standards they’ve set for other people as potential partners. The attitude of “I refuse to settle” is highly prevalent. Their entire attitude towards people is wrong, and that’s why they’re lonely. Has nothing to do with their looks or their perceived “failure” to live up to the beauty standards. It’s all them.
I have not seen your picture, nor do I ask to. But don’t believe you’re even half as “ugly” as you think you are. All I can say is, if there is something with you that you’re not happy with – change it. Groom yourself. If you don’t like your body, start exercising, go to the gym, or just take walks. Do whatever feels right for you – the most important thing is, you do it to please YOU, not other people, and not to live up to beauty standards. Make that guy in the mirror reflect who you wanna be, and whenever you see him, you can’t help but to smile. If you can attain even a fraction of that goal, you’re on the winning path.
I also encourage you to watch videos with psychologist clin. psychologist Jordan Peterson. You’ve probably heard of him, but in case you haven’t, he specializes in the psychology of men, and self help for men. He is very sentimental about the predicaments of men these days, and often says “One word of encouragement is often all it takes to make a man achieve. It takes so little…”
Good luck friend. Make yourself happy.