Just wanted to say that I like your new and ever expanding website. I know you said a year ago that you had lost the old one in the expanse of the universe…….but you have rebuilt it and it looks different, a little less black background but a lot of good stories and information and every link still leads to a new and exciting place, like a sex maze.
Its obviously by you but its a different shape. It must have been a lot of hard work. I have a question, well more of a thought…..as I grow older I find that I don’t want to have full on sex with men and dont….but I do want to be intimate, touching massage, working on each others jade stem…of course, which is what we do with you and thank the gods for you, you have given me a safe and nurturing place to find such amazing male intimacy. You have provided a great and safe gift for all men. when i was younger I cruised areas when I was horny, not a safe option.
I have used sex lines but they are expensive and again just about raw sex or pure fantasy and not a safe option nor a wise one.
Sometimes I want to touch and intimacy with men more often that once a month in Mr Cox`s palace of dreams and pleasure. I have visited (a place) once and its a real sex place, not very intimate or friendly and lots of unsafe sex happens and older guys like me, are not really that welcome. I stayed 20 minutes and left.
I have stopped watching porn, because your groups have taught me to be more real about sex, so as I am watching porn less my desire for real intimacy is returning and so I have greater need. Plus with no porn, I have started to have really hot dreams, which I have not had for years….amazing. I have put `jerk off/ masturbation groups for men` into search engines, I think they exist in fantasy but not in reality. Maybe San Francisco was the only place they actually happened as a reaction to AIDS…who knows. I also like the `no lips below the hips` idea, even though oral sex is amazing it can be intimidating if expected. Gay Sex groups/leather clubs and the like push away str8/bi/health conscious gay males because of their expectation of full sex or the risk of STIs and the expectation of a young body and a hard cock, and also the big performance thing hides a million anxieties.
I don’t want to take viagra, I would rather have a head massage. apart from your wonderful group are there groups guys who meet to touch and wank and relax in the safety of a private home or is this an urban myth…it might be just you? Perhaps the sauna scene is where such intimacy happens, I don’t really know. These are my thoughts and I don’t expect you to solve them or come up with an answer but I thought I would put the thoughts out there as I cant be the only guy, bi/gay/str8 who would just like some mutual masturbation/ erotic touch without the worry that STIs bring, and that it happens in a safe place. I have been in a men`s group for 6 years and occasionally talked about such things but such real sex talk is rare and not always appropriate or what men want in that therapeutic setting.
I know you have talked about having a spirituality group but I think that spritualising sex moves it away from the reality of intimacy.
The church fears sex so turns it into some kind of intimate god talk but with your pants firmly on, when in reality men want someone to touch them for real, only then do they see the divine. Real divinity cannot be separated from real physicality. As I don’t believe there is such a thing as an eternal soul separate from the body then divinity and sexuality and physical intimacy are the same and interchangeable, the real trinity of love. I think a group of men talking about their desires and anxieties and real needs and fears is missing.