I have had sex with many men, most of whom identify as straight, many of whom are married with children (and grandchildren). We have to accept that there is no such thing as “gay” or “straight” or “bisexual”. There is sexuality and homophobia.
Homophobia was invented by the Vatican during the Spanish Inquisition (1200-1800s) when gay men were burnt at the stake throughout Europe in their thousands. Gay men having to wear the pink triangle or were exterminated during the Nazi occupation of Europe [1924 (Italy) – 1975 (Spain)], has meant that men have been taught to hide their sexuality for good reasons. It was -and is- a life and death issue. The Taliban in Afghanistan recently threw openly gay men off buildings or stoned them to their death. Sexuality has been shrouded in fear and repression for too long. It is time we got honest with each other and learnt to love each other openly. Without the labels that get in the way of intimacy with another man. – Martin H.
I tend to agree with your comment that there is no gay, no bi, no straight. Only sexuality! I lived a straight life until middle age when I finely got the courage yto do what I always wanted to try… sucking a dick! After I did it opened a whole new world when I discovered so many men who are married, fathers, and masculine, long to have the courage to explore their own sexuality! I started by going to adult stores and saw many “ wedding rings” on guys visiting there! Some were sucking dicks, some were getting their dicks sucked, some were getting butt fucked. We all had one thing in common, we enjoyed erotic sex and were willing to “ help each other out” which created a bond stronger than just a friendship! I found that a guy sucking his first dick is more about having the courage and independence to do it rather than some mystical condition called being gay or bi!
We should accept our interest in sex, any type of sex, as part of our human experience!
In 1998, the BBC broadcast a documentary series titled “Living with the Enemy”. Each programme featured people with strongly held opinions who spend time with others of opposing views. I watched the series when first released, including this episode where two homophobic rugby players from Yorkshire stay for 5 days with a gay couple in London. Despite a few early positives, by no means can the experiment be classed as a successful cross-cultural exchange. Perhaps the outcome would have been better had the two pairs of men shared some common interests, whether sporting, social, family or work-related. I would very much like to see a “where are they now” follow up. Whether you are gay or homophobic, this programme makes for uncomfortable viewing:
(after a trailer, the programme starts at 0:45).
Thank You HugH
Living your sexuality to the fullest is still a utopia for many.
Loving another man and not being afraid to express this love in all environments, especially external ones, is sometimes a sentence of humiliation or even death, even for those who are openly gay. Because these “values” of the traditional family are still very strong in many places, even though there are strong LGBTQIP+ movements, many men still prefer to hide in a heterosexual marriage in order to keep their sexuality hidden.
I am from Brazil, a country that made homophobia a crime, and even so there are many “sham marriages”.
Being proud of being gay is for the few.
I want to live in a world where homosexuality is celebrated as the highest form of sexuality. Remove everything that is not sexual from sexuality and it becomes obvious that homosexuality is pure. There can me nothing more masculine than men having sex with men – and I’m sure the world would be better if that was universally accepted.