I’m a married man in my 50’s. I love my wife and family and I’ve been always attracted to men, since I was a kid. I have come to terms with my masculinity: I feel that being attracted to men is one of the most masculine aspects of my life. Discovering this site was a blast. All what I felt “weird” about myself finally got its right place. The community of manhood is powerful and it is a sacred place just for us men. I don’t feel lonely anymore. I have recently met a gay man and we have become friends with benefits. Although I had had sex with other men in the past, I feel a deep connection with this man. We share many interests and having sex is beyond what I knew of before. We have opened a space of manhood and friendship that feels even sacred. At the same time we respect our spaces. No pressures, no demands. Just pure enjoyment when we are together. Being able to recognize and accept this very important aspect of myself, has turned into a deeper connection with my wife. I don’t feel guilty anymore and I have started to resume our sex lives, put on hold for a long time. I feel complete and have fully embraced myself. Thank you for putting on light this site. – Andreas
Andreas, thank you for your sharing.
You have described me more or less.
I believe that there are so very many of us like this, but we have felt, as you say, “weird” about it.
This is purely the result of how our society has evolved to control and constrain our sexuality, using ridicule, threats, taboo, shame, violence and legal restrictions.
Some of us have been fortunate enough to begin to welcome our sexuality just as it is and to welcome the pleasure and brotherhood of sex between men.
Unlike you, I have not resumed sex with my wife. Although I love her deeply and we are happy together, I don’t have the desire any longer.
And unlike you, I seem to be in a sexual desert at the moment, and living in hope!
I agree with every word you have written. Same age, same desires, same history. Thank you for speaking out and sharing your truth so bravely.