I’m now 40 and have been having the same problem for all my live. I can’t tell about you for sure but it has probably nothing to do with blood circulation (at your age, very unlikely) but with anxiety and sensitivity. For example, I get rock hard when I’m fully relaxed and masturbating alone or if I’m totally comfortable with my sex partner. It can be very tricky in a world that is so cold with people expecting you to be some kind of fucking machine coming out of a porn and when you want to do it in an “hostile” environment like cruising areas, saunas, etc. Also I noticed that with some men, even if I see them 10 times, I’ll never get hard and with some others, it works the first time. You click or you don’t and some people seem to be psychologically “castrating” in some way. Unfortunately, I’d say that you have to learn coping with it, benzos (anti-anxiety pills) don’t make it better and are a nightmare in the long run, pot opens imagination and sex drive but can worsen anxiety, alcohol is a road leading to flat dick and addiction. I’m sure a lot of gay men go bottom because it’s easier this way if you know what I mean. Personally, I feel alright about it now. I find my sex partners on the Internet and have them coming to my house, a place I am comfortable in and I tend to have long term fuck buddies because the more i know them the more I am at ease with them. One of the key is accepting that we are humans with emotions and sensitivity, that life is not a cheap porn and that you don’t have to be like everybody around. I hope it will get better for you and you’ll find your way. Good luck ! – Lovedreamer
I also get performance anxiety but for me it’s with someone that I’m close to. I fear that I’m going to let them down. In my case, my failure is in my inability to orgasm. The more I fixate on it the more difficult it become for me to finish. This is both ongoing and extremely frustrating. In contrast I find things easier in one time, random hookups. I guess I reason that if something goes wrong during a random hook up I’ll never see that person again. There might be a brief awkward moment but that’s it. I think that takes the pressure off me and allows me to get off. In intimate relationships I’m the opposite of a premature ejaculator. Very frustrating. – JoE
Its ok to be sensitive Lovedreamer. It is ok to FEEL. .
It is one of our superpowers as Men that has been suppressed.
You are perfect as you are brother.
I have leaned by focusing on my intuition 24/7 that it becomes greatly enhanced.
Sometimes its scary but it is also absolutely wonderful and it is who and what we are as human Gods.
Awareness of our subconscious superpower leads to greater things in life. And Greater self knowledge.
Interesting post! All men learn at some point that you can’t take an erection for granted. In my case it sometimes happens when I meet someone who is unbelievably hot; my ultimate fantasy man. I’ve met a few men who are like a wet dream come true, and it’s as if I get imposter syndrome. There’s a man who is really into me, ready to make my horniest fantasies come true, and my dick won’t play! The best situation is to be with someone you know and feel comfortable with. And not to worry about it.