Chapter 28

(From My Secret Life By Walter)


We went into the bedroom together. She stayed in the sitting-room. “She is better there,” said he. “Let’s see your prick,” I said as, soon as I had a little overcome my tremor. He pulled it out, it looked small. I touched it with a sort of dislike. “Are you had of a bit of brown?” he asked. I did not understand and he explained. We always say a bit of brown among ourselves, and a cunts a bit of red.” I had a feeling of nausea, but went on. “Let’s frig you.” He took off all but his shirt, and seating him on my knee I began to frig him. He, questioned me whilst doing so had I been up a man? “No.” Then there was no pleasure like it. I frigged violently but his prick would not stand, I talked baudy and about women. He said a bit of brown is worth a hundred cunts.” I felt quite disconcerted, for his cock remained small and flabby. I had thought that talking about cunts would stiffen it The conversation, then led by him, took an arsehole turn. He asked me to let him feel my bumhole. I consented. In for a penny, in for a pound, I began to think. Taking down my trowsers, he looked at my bum, and his prick stood at the sight. “Is it virigin?” said he, and felt it. Then, standing by my side, my left arm round his waist to steady me, I frigged him, and the little bugger spent, but it was very little. I rushed to wash my hand.

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When he had composed himself, he washed his tool, and became very curious about me, and most energetically felt my prick. “Put it up me,” said he. “I can’t, my prick won’t stand” ‘Shall I suck it?” “You?” “Yes.” “Do you do so?” “Lord yes, I have had it so thick in my mouth, that I’ve had to pick it out of my teeth with a toothpick.” I turned sick, but after a time I turned his arse towards me, and got my prick stiff by hard frigging, determined to try what buggery was like. But the moment I put it against his arsehole down it drooped. He was kneeling at the side of the bed. “Wet it well with your spittle,” said he, wetting his own hole. It was useless, and I desisted. “You will presently,” he remarked. But tho I tried again and again, determined to know, everything, and to do everything once in my life, it was useless. Then he went to a drawer, and produced a small marble pestle such as chemists use, and asked me .to let him put it up my bum, extolling the pleasure I should have. “It must hurt,” I said. “Oh dear no, look.” Going to the side of the bed, he laid down, and sticking up his legs, shoved it up his own arsehole a little way. That only made me feel more sick, I was so unsophisticated in such matters. I expect he saw that, for he took it out But then he produced two more of different sizes, one quite a large one, and told me there was a friend he visited every week, who met him in his stables, and he put the larger one up his fundament. That man said it was not large enough to give him pleasure. “I put it up him to there” said the sodomite marking with his thumb the spot on the pestle. But the description made me feel more modest. “You should have the small one up first, I will do it for you, and I know such a sweet young man who would suck your prick at the same time if you would like.” “Oh, no .” “Do let me sod you,” said he all at once and quite affectionally, “I should so like to do it to you and take your virginity,” and he shook his prick, and frigged it a little. It was not stiff, and was very sharp pointed, but not at all a large one.I was now quite flabbergasted


His coolness and his tale of picking his teeth free of semen, made me actually shudder. Then the pestles. Fancy two men together in a stable, one shoving a pestle up the other’s bum. How curious I thought, yet how abominable, it’s incredible. Yet still I felt curious. “Does it make him spend?” I asked, “His prick stands after I have worked it up and down in the brown for a while, then I go on gently, and suck his prick, till he spends,” he replied coolly. Again I frigged him, curious to see his emotions, and watched his face when with difficulty he spent slightly. But my cock would not stand. So I went into the room to Betsy, determined to try her cunt. She had been, she told me afterwards, looking thro, and listening at the door all the time. “Don’t come near me,” said she to the sod.

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After much ado she made my cock stand, I mounted her, and fucked, feeling his prick whilst I did so that either suggested itself to me, or he suggested it and it seemed to increase my pleasure. Then as I rammed up Betsy’s cunt, I became conscious he was feeling me behind, and that his thumb or finger was intruding into my bum hole. “Feel her brown,” said he. I was in the height of my pleasure. “You beast,” said Betsy. Whether I obeyed his advice or not, I can’t say. I spent, and fetched her, and then we quickly parted. I gave him a sovereign, no more, and her two, before each other. They made no remark. I promised to see him again, but had no intention of doing so, and never did. I met her soon afterwards, and she was curious. “Did his arsehole seem large?” I was unable to tell her, disliked even to refer to yet my curiosity seemed unsatisfied and I had a sort of desire to learn more, yet a dislike to myself for desiring it. When she asked me if she should get him again, I refused point blank, yet all the time aching to try, and dissatisfied at not having put my prick up him, to see if it gave some unknown pleasure or not.

2 thoughts on “Chapter 28

  1. Banned for over 100 Years, My Secret Life was first published between 1888-1894 in 11 volumes in Amsterdam by the Belgian-born bookseller/publisher Auguste Brancart. No-one really knows the true identity of “Walter”. But biographer Ian Gibson claims it is the pen name of one Henry Spencer Ashbee, For the next hundred years, it remained banned and considered obscene and pornographic. Only 20-25 sets of My Secret Life were originally printed, and sold at£60 per set, an enormous sum for the times, equivalent to over £4000 ($6000) at today’s prices. It is extremely sexually explicit. It’s a snapshot of a man’s thoughts from the Victorean era of England. Though sexuality is the book’s main focus, Walter focuses so much time on sex, he doesn’t realize he is giving us a picture of himself, his emotions, and the values of the period. When reading it you should remember when it was written.

  2. My go to porn from sophomore year thru graduation in college…outstanding, bless the Grove Press for the paperback edition and the good binding job!

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